Bill Gates and Marc Andreessen in Heaven

Bill Gates and Marc Andreessen die and go to heaven. God meets them and announces that they will get stabbed with a needle for each major bug in their browser software.

First it's Marc's Turn: "In Navigator 1.0 there was a big security hole" DOUCHE! "In Navigator 1.1 you couldn't empty the cache" DOUCHE! Marc rubs his butt and looks around: "Where did Bill go?" God says in reply: "He's just being clamped into the sewing machine..."

Bill Gates and Divine Brown Spent a Night Together

After spending a night with Divine Brown, Bill Gates turns to her in the bed and says "I understand now why they call you Divine Brown. She turns back to him and says "And I now understand why you called your company Micro - Soft"

One day Bill Gates died and met god

One day Bill Gates died and met god. God said "Now then, Bill, i'll show you heaven and hell and you can choose which one you want to go to. Sound good?"
"Yeah!,"replies Gates.
So god takes Gates to hell first. In hell he shows him pretty maidens, beautiful landscapes and an endless supply of pop tarts.
"So you like it?"he asks him.
"Yeah, it's great,"Gates replies.
So god takes him to heaven. In heaven he shows him quite pretty maidens, quite beautiful landscapes and a not quite endless supply of pop tarts.
"So bill have you made your choice?"
"Yes, God. i want to go to hell,"
"OK then."
And Bill Gates is whisked away to hell. But it is not the hell he saw before. Here there are no pretty maidens, no beautiful landscapes and no pop tarts. Instead there are all the most horrible things ever.
"Aaaahhhh! Where am I!"asks Gates.
"In hell,"replies god.
"But it's not how it was before!"cries Gates.
"Aahh. That was just the demo Bill."